I confess I’ve been a little distant from my religion. I’m a Catholic but I do believe in the reincarnation. Therefore I end up having my own religion, which first commandment says: “Don’t do to others what you don’t want for yourself”.
Why am I distant from my religion?
I don’t think it should get into politics. When it does that it discriminates and goes to unknown fields…
Recently I had the pleasure to know the Bishop from the Toledo’s (Paraná – Brazil) Diocese, Rev. Anuar Battisti and I got very impressed by his kindness and singularity. Today, when checking my computer mailbox I found the following message that my friend Luciane Daux sent me. It immediately reminded me of Rev. Anuar and in his name I want to share this preciousness which Dom Orlando gave “life”.
Family and Dialogue
Rev. Orlando Brandes. Bishop from Joinville’s (Santa Catarina - Brazil) Diocese
- Every dialogue is an act of trust in the other. The suspicious closes himself up, feels threatened, is afraid of being betrayed, misunderstood, and explored. Trust is faith in the other, and this way are opened the doors of confidence, intimacy, communication, friendship. It’s trust what takes us to the truth and makes easy the exchange of feelings, convictions, problems and success. Without trust there’s no truthful dialogue. Dialogue requests the “feelings communication”. Speak ideas is easy. Show what we feel requires more, because the feeling does not lie. When we speak of feelings we don’t go into discussion, because the feelings are respected. We always welcome whoever opens up and confidence his feelings and it fraternizes us. We realize that we are the same. What’s blocked becomes destructive energy; what’s spoken of is healed.
- The dialogue’s beauty requires the “emotions talk”. It’s naming emotions. That creates intimacy. Unspoken emotions are not solved and “what we don’t solve, life gives us back”. Locked emotions generate future diseases and end up making the dialogue cheap. Unspoken emotions provoke murmuring, fights, tears, anger. The one who holds the emotions reinforce aggression. What we deny makes us fall. Bottled emotions don’t die; they just explode in other unwelcome moments.
- The dialogue’s golden rule is “not to invade”. When I say: I know what you’re thinking, I’ll show you how you’re wrong; or when we accuse, criticize, advise, give orders, we are invading. Another way of invading is to put high and misplaced expectations into the talk. The higher the expectation, higher the frustration. “Wanting the other to guess what I want is an unreal expectation. Nobody is compelled to respond to others’ expectations.
- In a dialogue you always say the “truth with charity”. Truth said in an aggressive way, with no charity, destroys. Truths told the right way; with politeness, with tenderness, are touching. Truth with no charity is a killer. The way of saying the truth is a big secret for the dialogue’s success.
- Dialogue is “telling the love”. People need to know that they are loved. Where there’s love, dialogue doesn’t hurt, on the contrary, it heals, builds and set us free. Dialogue is meant to create bridges and destroy walls; it’s a school of life. God, when revealing himself to humanity through Moses “spoke to him as a friend”. Jesus, son of God, is the word, the verb, the personificated dialogue, like flesh. Where the dialogue is, there is God.
From the Brazilian magazine “A Noticia” – Aug 2004.
We do not express our truth only in our gestures and attitudes. The truthful attitude of recognition is to elect who should occupy our space. Today I bow and reverence to a man of God: Rev. Orlando Brandes.
Saul Brandalise Jr. é colaborador do Site, autor do livro: O Despertar da Consciência da editora Theus, onde mostra através das narrativas de suas experiências como extrair lições de vida e entusiasmo de cada obstáculo que se encontra ao longo de uma vida. Email: [email protected] Visite o Site do Autor